We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
