i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
