I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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