If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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