dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize
