i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
