is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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