i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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