i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
We smell like vodka and hangover
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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