he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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