You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
third nipple confirmed
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
