Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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