im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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