If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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