9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
