I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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