She's JV to your varsity
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize