Walk of Shame. In a state park.
im holly from the hills drunk
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
He did a backflip because drugs
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
