OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
