Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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