I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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