Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
You can't special order awesome
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
