Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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