I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
