respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
bring money and cleavage
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Randomize
