so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
