Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Randomize
