I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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