Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Randomize
