What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
