I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Randomize
