You can't special order awesome
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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