go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
