this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
