I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
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