He kissed a someone with a penis
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
