Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
