Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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