I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
