i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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