Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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