I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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