my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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