oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
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