I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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