I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
