He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
pray to the hookup gods
Randomize
