Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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