Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
