I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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