I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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